It might sound obvious. Yet, unbelievably, NHS staff are supposedly having to be told not to defecate in a bin.
It is just one example of the bonkers world of NHS signs, with staff often sharing the funniest and weirdest examples on social media. On X, formerly Twitter, there is even an account dedicated to showcasing some of the best.
Often handmade, the posters, signs and notes are designed to cajole, warn, inform and even threaten medics and sometimes even patients.
Here, MailOnline has collected a number of examples allegedly sighted within the health service…
Crumbling NHS infrastructure is a real concern, as this alleged health service poster highlights. However, some on social media theorised other sources of noise the poster might be making visitors aware of, such as rats. The exact NHS trust the poster belongs to was not named but similar ones have been spotted at the Queen Elizabeth Hospital in Lynn. Posted by Jon Coupland in Lincolnshire
This sign was allegedly spotted at the NHS’s Countess of Chester Hospital. It comes as STI rates have recently exploded in many parts of England. Poster by @GlenworthEver from Richmond
These signs, reportedly spotted in an NHS staff room, have warnings that appliances are reserved for certain staff. The notices, which say ‘do not ty and force’, were posted online by @DrIpFeed4
This sign warning of a wasp infestation warning was apparently posted in 2016 at an unnamed NHS trust. Submitted to the X account @SignsofHealth
This warning of ‘NO ENTRY PIGEON problem’ from 2022 is another example of animal infestations plaguing the day-to-day running of the health service. This one was posted by Cardiff nurse @georgecxde
This alleged NHS sign seeks to dispel rumours of a ‘washing-up fairy’ patrolling the Trust and urges staff to wash-up their plates, mugs and cutlery and not leave them in the sink. Posted by @Monique_jadey
This shocking alleged NHS sign advises how ‘somebody’ defecating inside a bin as opposed to the toilet in health service bathroom. Posted by Rhodri Morgan-Smith Nantwich
Another alleged NHS bathroom sign located in the gents of an Intensive Care Unit advises how the ‘lock’ can get stuck. Posted by Bristol GP Johnny Bryant
NHS budgets run into the billions and some staff are keen to ensure every penny is well-spent, as this alleged health service sign of hand towels seems to suggest. Posted by @WallNoise
Here, another alleged NHS office sign both advises how to operate a diabolical photocopier as well as lament its very existence. Posted by South London paediatrician Sarah Sturrock
This alleged health service sign advises staff on the convoluted method to operating lighting in an NHS room. Posted by consultant Dr Ben Lovell
‘Ass-king’ is not some sort bizarre social media trend but an acronym designed to help remind staff about checking for pressure ulcers a type of injury which patients can suffer if they lie in one position for too long. While some staff have highlighted the odd word the mnemonic produces, others say its certainly memorable. Posted by @ODanaos