A woman who gave up alcohol after more than a decade of daily drinking left her struggling to get out of bed has revealed how her life has changed since binning the booze.
Melissa Lionnet’s drinking spiralled out of control as her career in event management flourished.
Trapped in the perennially social cut and thrust of the Sydney entertainment industry, Ms Lionnet found herself wining and dining clients almost every night of the week, leading to near-constant hangovers and blackouts for most of her 20s.
She reached a turning point when her partner of six years confronted her about her drinking, saying he was no longer certain about the future of their relationship.
Now 32 and approaching her one-year anniversary of sobriety, Ms Lionnet has quit her high-flying job to coach others in the benefits of giving up alcohol – but admits there is no straight path to teetotal life.
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Sydney sobriety coach Melissa Lionnet (pictured with a glass of alcohol-free wine in 2021) quit drinking after more than a decade of abusive consumption
Ms Lionnet (pictured in Bali in 2019) started drinking at the age of 15 and quickly developed a toxic relationship with alcohol
She told Daily Mail Australia that quitting requires education about the effects of alcohol consumption, self-discovery through therapy and developing a meaningful connection with the sober community through social media or support groups.
Ms Lionnet said her toxic relationship with alcohol began when she was 15 years old.
Raised by her grandmother, she said she used alcohol as an escape when she began to suffer from depression and suicidal thoughts.
Like many teenagers, Ms Lionnet started drinking with friends, but quickly found she was always the ‘drunkest one at the party’.
‘At the time it seemed completely normal, it was fun because everyone was doing it,’ she said.
Her drinking became progressively worse when she started working in hospitality and bagged a lucrative gig as an events manager, a role that involved frequent schmoozing and taking clients to functions such as the Melbourne races.
‘I was always entertaining people and it always involved alcohol,’ she recalled.
‘But when it’s part of the job you don’t see it as a problem – that was just my normal, feeling like s**t for four days a week.’
Ms Lionnet (pictured in 2018) said her drinking became progressively worse when she bagged a gig as an events manager, a role that involved frequent schmoozing and taking clients to functions such as the Melbourne races
Ms Lionnet said her partner was left to deal with her increasingly erratic mood swings, indecision, low self-esteem and depression, while she continued to excel at work.
To the outside world, she was in control of her life, but behind closed doors the reality was very different.
‘I’d stumble home and he’d have to drag me in from the garden or find me passed out on the couch,’ she said.
‘He was the only one seeing me how I really was, and eventually he said “I don’t know if I want to marry you, I can’t be your carer”.
‘It made me realise I never want to be the person that someone has to look after.’
Since quitting alcohol, Ms Lionnet (pictured in 2021) feels more motivated than she has in years and no longer struggles to get out of bed in the mornings
After years of self-loathing, shame, and struggling to get out of bed in the mornings, Ms Lionnet resolved to reshape her relationship with alcohol.
She signed up for a 30-day detox challenge in 2019 which allowed her to see how different life could be, hangover-free.
‘It gave me back a lot of clarity,’ she said, adding: ‘I think your sober journey begins from the moment you start thinking about reassessing your relationship with alcohol.’
Ms Lionnet dipped in and out of these programmes for a year, but always returned to the bottle when the challenge wrapped.
Ms Lionnet (back row, second from left) credits sober social media groups which have provided her with an online community of like-minded alcohol-free friends (pictured) for keeping her on track over the past 12 months
It wasn’t until she started educating herself about what excessive alcohol consumption really does to the body that she was able to fully relinquish her dependence.
Alcohol causes damage to the liver, heart and brain, as well as digestive difficulties which are triggered by the large quantities of acid drinks are laced with.
It has also been shown to disrupt and reduce sleep quality, with drinkers who imbibe shortly before bed often experiencing restlessness and debilitating fatigue the following day.
Experts say binning the booze for just one month can transform your health, provided the temporary abstinence leads to a more moderate and mindful approach to drinking in the long run.
Dietitians and fitness coaches promise even short periods without alcohol will improve memory, mental clarity and sleep, as well as promoting weight loss and reducing pressure on the liver which starts to cleanse itself just one hour after your last drink.
Ms Lionnet said she experienced an epiphany when she realised that drinking is a habit that can be unlearned, just like biting your nails or twirling your hair.
She credits sober social media groups which have provided her with an online community of like-minded friends for keeping her on track over the past 12 months.
‘So many people are going through the same thing, feeling guilty and not knowing how to break the cycle,’ Ms Lionnet said.
‘I now have alcohol-free friends who I’ve met on Instagram and it’s so important – there’s no judgment and no pressure from people who are drinking.’
Since giving up alcohol, Ms Lionnet said she has lost weight – ‘about four kilos’ – while her hair has thickened and her skin looks ‘so much brighter’.
She no longer suffers from eczema-like rashes that used to be a constant feature all over her body when she was drinking to excess.
Ms Lionnet said she her diet has also improved dramatically, which has had a positive knock-on effect on her finances as she doesn’t waste money on Uber Eats to nurse her hangovers.
Her mental health has completely transformed, with consistent moods, improved clarity and a strong motivation to achieve her dreams.
‘I always want to get out of bed now which is huge for me. It’s the consistency, that’s the best thing,’ she said.
In the past year, Ms Lionnet has started an Instagram account – It’s Not Me, It’s Booze – which she describes as a safe space for anyone who is reevaluating their relationship with alcohol.
She has also quit her job to launch a habit-building app called Starting Five, which provides meditation classes, breathing exercises and coping techniques for those attempting to go teetotal.
Members of her online community can join free Zoom calls on Saturday mornings to talk through the week and any thoughts they are having.
Ms Lionnet insists she couldn’t have done any of this while she was drinking.
‘I didn’t have the energy, I felt like I was crippled with imposter syndrome, unmotivated just using up all my energy on working and getting through the day hungover,’ she said.
Recent figures from the Australian Bureau of Statistics reveal more than a quarter of Australians – 28.9 percent – are mostly abstaining from alcohol, while a further 9.5 percent are drinking less than they were this time last year.
Over the past four years, the number of ex-drinkers in Australia rose from 1.5million to 1.9million – and there is a growing sober scene, largely fuelled by hordes of Instagram influencers who tout the benefits of their alcohol-free lifestyles online.
But despite the increasing ‘coolness’ associated with turning teetotal, Ms Lionnet has still experienced negative reactions when she tells acquaintances she’s ditched the booze.
Ms Lionnet (pictured in 2021) believes your sober journey begins from the moment you start reassessing your relationship with alcohol
‘The response is always sort of like, “what’s wrong with her?”, “she can’t be trusted” because she doesn’t drink,’ she said.
‘I want to empower people to know it’s a habit that can be unlearned – we’re conditioned to believe that alcohol should be a part of our lives and it doesnt need to be.’
You can follow Ms Lionnet’s personal journey on Instagram through the It’s Not Me, It’s Booze account, or sign up for habit-building classes on the app, Starting Five.
For support for alcohol-related problems and addiction you can contact Turning Point Services, or one of the many other services available, speak to your GP, local health service or call a helpline.
There are trained telephone counsellors available in every Australian state and territory.
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