A mother has revealed how her son died after jumping out of a car at 8mph to avoid going to rehab to treat his addiction to alcohol.
Tom Maybury, from Shropshire, was plunged into a depression when his relationship ended and he was involved in a drink-driving incident which led him to lose his license.
His mother Sally and brother Henry, 29, have now recalled how he and ‘fell into the cycle’ of drinking and was in a ‘complete mess’ , before finally agreeing to go to rehab in 2013.
However as Sally drove along at 80mph to the centre, Tom opened the door and flung himself from the car, suffering fatal injuries and dying 10 days later.
The mother-of-four explained: ”I think Tom was fully aware he was going to die, and he actually said to me, “Mum, please will you be with me when I die? Don’t leave me on my own”.
‘I could see he was getting worse and I actually laid down on the bed with him. I stayed with him holding his hand and waited until he actually passed away.’
Tom Maybury, from Shropshire, was plunged into a depression when his relationship ended and he was involved in a drink-driving incident which led him to lose his license
His mother Sally and brother Henry, 29, have now recalled how he and ‘fell into the cycle’ of drinking and was in a ‘complete mess’ , before finally agreeing to go to rehab in 2013
Tom’s spiral into alcoholism was unpredictable and unforeseen by his family until he was already in it, and they now want people to know how different it can look from the stereotype of being a disease for ‘old’ or ‘unhygienic’ people.
For Tom the triggers involved breaking up with a girlfriend and a subsequent DUI that meant he lost his licence.
Speaking in a new documentary about alcohol addiction, Tom’s brother Henry said: ‘If I were to stereotype an alcoholic, I would say, old – and that was nothing like Tom.
‘He was a guy who was doing so well in his early twenties, so he was like anyone. He would after work go to the pub and catch up with friends after a couple of pints.’
Tom’s brother Henry appears in the documentary film alongside his mother and describes the difficulties his brother faced with addiction (pictured together)
His mother Sally said: ‘And then suddenly his relationship ended and he was a pretty cut up.’
Henry added: ‘On one occasion after work, he stopped off at the pub and had a couple of pints.
‘On his way back, he blacked-out behind the wheel. They breathalyzed him and he lost his license.
‘Suddenly his confidence just went. He was majorly suffering with his mental health. He’d lost his license, he’s suddenly working three or four days a week.
Henry said his brother had been doing ‘so well’ in his twenties but struggled with depression after a relationship broke down
After losing his driving license, Tom continued to fall into cycles of being depressed and wanting to drink
‘But whenever he wasn’t working, he’d fall into the cycle of once again feeling depressed and wanting to drink.
‘He was now, in a complete mess. He was red and blotchy and looked really visually ill.’
He continued: ‘It was just so scary to see this was happening to him, and the alcohol was now havign this effect on him.’
Sally explained how important is it is to get an alcoholic person help when they’re seeking it: ‘With an addict there’s such a little window to be able to get hold of them and actually get them the help that they need.’
Tom struggled with addiction for years before he was finally convinced to check into rehab, and Sally drove him there, fearing that he would change his mind at any moment.
She recalled: ‘One evening, he said, “Mum can you get me into the rehab?” I was driving from my place and going 70-80mph because I knew I had to get him there quickly.
‘When suddenly he said, “Stop the car”, and bearing in mind I’m going 70-80mph, he opened the car door.
Tom struggled with addiction for years before he was finally convinced to check into rehab, and Sally drove him there, fearing that he would change his mind at any moment
‘And that was just because he could see the rehab. He thought, “I’m going to be locked up.” and he could see his can going further and further away.’
Tragically, Tom sustained fatal injuries and died in hospital ten days later surrounded by his loved ones.
Since his death, Sally, a mother-of-four, and son Henry have been travelling around the UK visiting schools, prisons and rehab centres to share Tom’s story.
However, when Covid struck and their work completely stopped, the mother and son created a documentary style educational video to spread their message.
Henry described songwriting as a ‘massive emotional release’ since his brother’s death and explained: ‘I remember picking up my songbook and came across Lost Days, and that was the moment when I thought, I want to do a video.
‘One of the messages that we really wanted to be in the video was, it doesn’t matter who you are or where you’re from, or your background, addiction can happen to anyone.
Since his death, Sally, a mother-of-four, and son Henry have been travelling around the UK visiting schools, prisons and rehab centres to share Tom’s story
After seeing what Tom went through and viewing his suffering first hand, the mother and son duo decided to set up the Lost Days charitable trust.
Speaking about their experience with the Trust Sally said: ‘We actually go into schools, into prisons, and into rehabs and give them—particularly the prisons and rehabs—some positivity so when they come out they have hope.’
Henry said: ‘The aim of the family’s trust is to sponsor addicts to get rehabilitation help from centres they can trust.
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‘If we can help just one person, the pain of reliving the experience again and again will just be so worth it.
After seeing what Tom went through and viewing his suffering first hand, the mother and son duo decided to set up the Lost Days charitable trust
The family released the video just in time for national Alcohol Awareness Week which will take place between November 15 and 21.
They hope, as well as spreading awareness, the video will help raise funds for The Lost Days Charitable Trust which was set up in Tom’s memory.
The charity has already raised thousands of pounds for addiction charities helping support those with drug and alcohol dependencies.
Sally said: ‘The video about our true story really hits hard because it’s based on real life experiences.’
‘We aim to raise awareness of mental health and addiction, highlight the undeniable potential dangers of alcohol and remove the stigma associated with addiction.
‘It’s important for people to realise that they are not alone, that there is help available and they must talk about their situation to let their feelings out.’
For confidential support, call the Samaritans on 116123 or visit a local Samaritans branch. See www.samaritans.org for details
Source: Daily Mail
