Authorities searching for Brian Laundrie at the reserve were led there on a tip from his parents. In the notebook recovered by authorities, Laundrie allegedly confessed in writing to killing Petito, as Fox News goes on to report. Though the notebook was underwater for some time, large portions of Laundrie’s writing were still legible.

In what was written, Laundrie apologized to his family. He also requested in a general comment — possibly directed toward the public and media — to not make things any harder for his family than they already would be. Laundrie also wrote (via Fox News) that his family had lost both a son and a daughter, and he referred to Petito as the most wonderful girl in the world. “Gabby I’m sorry,” Laundrie wrote in the notebook.

Elsewhere in the notebook, Laundrie seemed intent to take his own life, writing, “From the moment I decided, took away her pain, I knew I couldn’t go on without her” (via TMZ). Suicide was later confirmed to be Laundrie’s cause of death, per CNN.

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