Courtney Stodden says writing memoir ‘shined light on’ alleged ‘grooming’ that led to marriage at 16

Courtney Stodden has opened up about how writing their upcoming memoir ‘shined a light’ on the alleged ‘grooming’ that led to them marrying actor Doug Hutchison, who was 51 at the time, when they were just 16.

Stodden, now 27 – who identifies as non-binary and uses they/them gender pronouns – faced widespread media scrutiny, received death threats, and was labeled everything from a ‘teen bride’ to a ‘whore’ for marrying a man 34 years their senior in 2011.

After 10 years of marriage, they filed for divorce in 2018 – and it was finalized two years later.

Then, during an appearance on Alex Cooper’s Call Her Daddy podcast last month, they spoke out about the alleged ’emotional and physical abuse’ that they faced from Hutchison during their marriage.

Now, Stodden has explained how ‘reliving it all again’ while writing their unreleased and untitled book was ‘extra challenging,’ but gave them ‘better insight’ in the end.  

The TV personality said they have been working with a therapist while penning the book, adding that it’s helped set them ‘free’ and ‘see the situation for what it is.’

‘A lot of different chapters in my life have been challenging to live through once and then to kind of go back and relive it again in order to tell the story is extra challenging, but it also gives me a better insight,’ Stodden told Fox News Digital during a recent interview.

‘I’m working with a therapist right now to kind of process it all too as I’m writing it out and reliving it again, and it’s freeing.

‘It’s definitely given me a better outlook on it. I see it for what it is. It has shined a light on the grooming and what happened to me and what actually happens to a lot of other children in the USA as well.’   

Stodden said that going through that trauma at such a young age made them ‘so strong’ in the end. 

The model added that they want to share their story so that other ‘victims and survivors’ can have someone to relate to.

They continued, ‘I am a really empathetic, sensitive person, and I always have been. But my experience has made me so strong.

‘If it didn’t happen, I feel like my whole outlook on life would be so different.  Experiences that are traumatizing can either break us or we can utilize them to shape us into a stronger individual.

‘And that’s really one of the main reasons why I’m speaking out is because I want past victims and survivors to really tap into that part of themselves. We are so strong. It’s just really made me very fearless.’

During their appearance on Cooper’s podcast in March, Stodden claimed they had to have sex with Hutchison, now 61, on his schedule and alluded to him being violent, saying: ‘I still have scars on me – physical scarring.’ 

In addition to the ‘abuse’ Stodden said they faced behind closed doors, the former reality star also spoke out about the incessant bullying that they received from the media, fans, and other celebrities over the relationship. 

Among the most violent and consistent hatred that Stodden received was from Chrissy Teigen, 36, who urged the then-teenager to take a ‘dirt nap’ and ‘go to sleep forever’ in a series of tweets posted in 2011 and 2012.  

Stodden hit out at Teigen over the vile death threats – comparing her to Mean Girls villain Regina George and slamming the model for not personally apologizing to them for the barrage of hatred – while opening up about the devastating toll that the online abuse had on their mental health. 

‘Not only have I not met her, I have never spoken to her in my life,’ Stodden told Cooper, when asked if Teigen had ever personally reached out to apologize.

They added that the bullying was made all the more difficult to handle because they had been a fan of both Teigen and her husband, John Legend, up until the mother-of-two began targeting them online. 

‘I actually really liked her. Like I followed her. I mean, obviously, I love John Legend,’ they said.

‘I was following them and then I started seeing this on my timeline and I was like, “But I love you!” I just had this feeling, “But I really like you!”‘

Stodden said that it has taken years for them to process the true impact of the public hatred that they received, revealing that they now believe it ‘led to their future depression.’ 

‘At that point in time, I was so young, I don’t think I processed how deeply that led to my future depression,’ they said. 

While Stodden faced an array of abusive comments and messages from celebrities and strangers alike, they said the most persistent hatred came from Teigen, who privately messaged them ‘for a really long time,’ in addition to her public messages to Stodden.

‘She [privately] messaged me a lot, it was like, sometimes really late, like 2 in the morning?’ they said, adding: ‘It wasn’t just one or two tweets… it was [for] a really long time.’ 

When asked about the most memorable comment Teigen sent them, Stodden claimed the model once told them: ‘I cannot wait for you to die,’ in a private message.  

‘I specifically remember this one because I was just like so shocked,’ they recalled. ‘It was really early in the morning at some point. I mean, this was a freaking decade ago…  She messaged me, “I cannot wait for you to die.”

READ RELATED: Don’t insist on being positive – allowing negative emotions has much to teach us

‘And that was just one of them that I remember. And then publicly she was saying, you know, “I can’t wait for you to take a dirt nap.” She was just obsessed with seeing me die.’

Teigen publicly apologized for her bullying tweets aimed at Stodden, Lindsay Lohan, and others in a lengthy Medium post last year, insisting that she is no longer that person. 

At the time, she also stated on Twitter that she had ‘tried to connect with Courtney privately,’ writing: ‘Since I publicly fueled this, I want to also publicly apologize. I’m so sorry, Courtney. I hope you can heal now knowing how deeply sorry I am.’

However Stodden said that Teigen has never reached out to them personally to say sorry, adding that the mother-of-two had long-since blocked them on social media by the time she issued her mea culpa. 

‘I know people can change a lot in [the time since Teigen posted her death threats], but I didn’t hear from her when she apologized. I was blocked from everything!’ the TV personality said. 

Stodden also came to the defense of Lohan, 35, who was also on the receiving end of bullying messages from Teigen at the same time, suggesting that the model ‘must have been in a really dark place’ to have made the comments that she did. 

‘She was [also] shaming Lindsay Lohan, who was struggling with a lot of her own stuff,’ they said. 

‘I just freaking love Lindsay. Chrissy has to have been in a really dark a** place to tell these children and women these things. To, I don’t know, make herself feel better about herself?’

Referring to Teigen’s public apology, Stodden added that they ‘hope she means’ what she said about changing her ways, warning that the kind of online hatred they received from the model can lead to severe mental health issues and even cause people to take their own lives.  

‘I know now she says she’s doing the best she can, and I really hope that she means it,’ they said.

‘If that stuff continues, we’re just going to see more suicides, unfortunately, it’s not going to help.’

Stodden insisted that they don’t care whether or not they hear from Teigen, before comparing her to Regina George, the villain from Lohan’s hit 2014 movie Mean Girls.

‘I really don’t have anything to say to her,’ they added. ‘I don’t need to speak to Regina George. I don’t need that. I’m Lindsay.’

DailyMail.com reached out to Teigen’s spokesperson for additional comment. 

During their interview with Cooper, Stodden also spoke out about the alleged abuse that they faced at the hands of Hutchison during their ten-year marriage, claiming that, two months into the relationship, the actor became like ‘Jekyll and Hyde’ as a result of his drinking.   

‘He was extremely emotionally abusive to me. At times physical, but mostly emotionally abusive,’ they alleged.

‘Because I think that’s the ultimate power a groomer has over a child, is that emotional abuse and control.’ 

Stodden claimed he had a gun in the house, but explained they didn’t want to ‘legally talk about that’ when asked if he would ever take the weapon out when he was drunk.   

They said that the combination of the online abuse and the turmoil within their marriage led them to start drinking illegally, revealing that they would end up ‘crying on the kitchen floor every night’.  

‘I was way too young to be crying on the kitchen floor every freaking night with a bottle of wine and opening another one,’ they said.

‘I felt like I didn’t have at that point in time, 17 years old, like I had anybody in my corner because I was being told to commit suicide at 16 [by online trolls].’ 

The former Celebrity Big Brother star shared that their mother, Krista Keller, also faced abuse online for allowing her daughter to wed a man who was more than three decades older than them, when they were just a teenager. 

It was Stodden’s mother who legally consented to the marriage, and it took years for them to see Hutchison’s predation as child abuse.  

The television personality noted that their mother had ‘always been very protective’ of them and now regrets signing off on their marriage. 

‘My mom has gotten a lot of hate, and I understand why,’ Stodden said. ‘If I ever have a baby and I’m raising that baby, from my own experiences, I would never sign my kid off, ever, to an adult man, who is 34 years older. There is just no way that would happen. 

‘But I think she thought she was doing something that was going to make me happy, truthfully. I really believe that.

‘In retrospect, she knows it was the wrong decision. She’s apologized to me so many times and has said, you know, “If I could just do anything to do over, I’m just so sorry, I wouldn’t sign off on this.”

‘Every minute, I would turn around, there’d be another hit piece, you know, in the grocery store or somewhere else,’ they recalled.

‘People were talking about how I was dressing or behaving. Little did they know then that is a part of grooming. I was trying to be that part, right? That part really did a doozy on my self-worth, really.’

Now, Stodden has moved on and is gearing up to marry film producer Chris Sheng, 42, after he popped the question in May 2021.

But despite saying yes to his proposal, the TV personality is not rushing into another marriage. 

‘I think that’s the key for me is to take my time and not to rush anything,’ they told Fox News.

‘The next time I walk down the aisle, I want to just feel like I’m completely prepared. I wasn’t prepared the first time, and there’s a lot of trauma surrounding the idea of marriage for me.’

They said things will be different this time around since they are ‘an adult’ with a ‘developed brain.’

‘My brain will be developed, and I’ll be able to make my own decision completely and fully transparently to myself,’ they explained.