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The following article includes mention of suicide and addiction.
Former “Dancing with the Stars” professional dancer Allison Holker has faced a number of tragic life occurrences throughout her life and her career. The truth about the former wife of the late dancer and “Ellen” entertainer Stephen “tWitch” Boss has audiences speculating her true intentions, particularly when it comes to her ex-husband’s death. But it’s more than backlash that Holker has endured.
From experiencing harrowing circumstances as a young dancer, to watching her children struggle with bullying, she has dealt with a wide gamut of trying issues. However, she’s worked hard to handle things as best she can with those most important to her, her children, in mind. “I think it’s for all of them,” she shared with Today. “I don’t really have any other choice but to be strong.”
Allison Holker was ‘taken advantage of’ as a teenager
Allison Holker revealed a lot of dark secrets in her 2025 memoir, “This Far: My Story of Love, Loss, and Embracing the Light.” One of her earliest traumas occurred during her teenage years, where she claims she was abused as a young dancer by an older man. While she didn’t share too many details, she did say that this was unfortunately a common occurrence in the dancing community, particularly when it comes to instructor and student relationships.
Holker explained that with the inherent sensuality and vulnerability that comes with dance training, there was room for questionable methods and motivations within the industry. In her particular situation, she felt such deep shame that she questioned what she had done wrong to let things progress the way they did. “It tore me apart for a lot of years,” she revealed on “The Jamie Kern Lima Show.” “I felt like it was my fault.” But she was able to overcome that shame by realizing that she “was taken advantage of” and used her history to help inspire new young dancers to take care of themselves in more ways than one — which ultimately brought her great pride.
She and her family have dealt with bullying
Unfortunately for Allison Holker, being a victim of bullying runs in her family. When she was a young up-and-coming dancer, the performer faced her fair share of “mean girls” who made fun of her for working part-time as a janitor in exchange for training at her dance studio. “I had to stand my ground and know that I’m doing this for a better purpose for myself and [that] I believe in myself,” she admitted on “The Jamie Kern Lima Show.”
Years later, Holker’s daughter, Weslie, would face her own bullies, this time online and on social media. When discussing how she and late husband Stephen “tWitch” Boss approached the topic with their child, Holker detailed similar sentiments in standing up for oneself in the face of adversity from peers and others. They also encouraged her to speak up for herself and not let others speak for her. “‘Instead of ignoring it and just letting it fester inside, let’s talk to the people,'” Holker told her daughter, which she recalled in a 2020 interview with People. “‘Let’s understand why they’re doing it and acknowledge that this is a problem that we shouldn’t allow.'”
Her husband took his own life
In what became one of the most defining tragedies of her life, Allison Holker experienced the tragic death of her husband Stephen “tWitch” Boss. The fellow dancer and media personality took his own life in December 2022, leaving behind Holker and their three children. After filing a missing persons report, the dancer spent hours communicating with police officers and rehab clinics while she searched for Boss.
At first, Holker was skeptical of the police officers’ questions as they initially tried to find out the truth of Holker and Boss’ relationship. The authorities asked her questions about the gun that Boss had recently purchased for protection, and whether or not the pair had gotten into an argument before his disappearance. Holker affirmed there was a gun in their home, but that they had not had a fight -– in fact, they had just returned from an anniversary trip.
Eventually, it was confirmed that Boss had committed suicide, and she learned of the event while in their family home. “The world went black,” she wrote in her memoir (via People). “The walls closed in on me until I thought I was going to suffocate. Until that moment, I had never understood the phrase ‘It’s like the world stopped.’ That’s exactly how it felt: as if time froze.”
She learned of her husband’s alleged drug issues after his death
In her memoir, Allison Holker painted the devastating picture of Boss’ secret struggles before his death, explaining that the “Magic Mike XXL” star was troubled and turned to substance use while trying to deal with his inner demons. It wasn’t until after his death that Holker discovered his journals, where she learned of just how devastating his inner battle was in the days leading up to the tragedy. “He was wrestling with a lot inside himself, and he was trying to self-medicate and cope with all those feelings because he didn’t want to put it on anyone because he loved everyone so much,” she explained to People.
Holker went on to describe the wide array of drugs, paraphernalia, and the like that she discovered among Boss’ possessions as she prepared for his funeral. She also revealed that he had been struggling to cope with sexual abuse he endured in the past. All of these instances seemed to contradict what Holker described as her husband’s “Superman” role within their family, but she pieced together his tragic rationale in the end. “It was a really scary moment in my life to figure that out, but it also helped me process that he was going through so much and he was hiding so much, and there must have been a lot of shame in that,” she told People.
She struggled with daily life after her husband’s passing
Allison Holker made a promise after her husband’s funeral to continue sharing his message of love and light to others, including creating the Move with Kindness mental health foundation in his honor. But even while trying to focus on the light, Holker admitted she was experiencing life in a brand new way. “You can’t really prep for something like this,” she said on the “Richer Lives” podcast. “I would have never saw my life going down this kind of path.”
In her life after the tragic death of Boss, Holker has focused on both herself and her three children as they navigate their lives post-tragedy. She even revealed that her eldest daughter, Weslie, was the last person to see Boss alive, as well as hear his devastating last words: “I wish I could be your Superman.” The mother shared that her daughter handles her daily grief with overwhelming grace and has taken steps to help her communicate her thoughts and needs in a healthy way. “I think she also sees those words as something beautiful, and also ugly,” Holker told People. “It’s a battle that she’s going to always have with herself, but I know she can see it from both sides.”
Her late husband’s family is considering legal action over her memoir claims
After her bombshell memoir dropped in February 2025, not all audiences were eager to read it. The family of the late Stephen “tWitch” Boss expressed deep resentment over Allison Holker’s handling of the situation and the fallout from it. Boss’ brother Dré Rose posted a revealing letter on Instagram that mentioned a non-disclosure agreement that the family was made to sign, as well as the family’s estrangement from Boss’ children following his death.
Boss’ mother, Connie Boss Alexander, also spoke publicly about the situation, particularly with Holkers’ claims about her late husband’s alleged drug use. “I will not let these accusations go unanswered,” she wrote on Instagram. “We will not stand by while his name and legacy are tarnished. He doesn’t deserve this, and the kids don’t deserve this.”
The pair went so far as to appear together on “CBS Mornings” to affirm that they intended to pursue legal action against Holker. They also shared that they had not heard of Boss’ sexual abuse claims prior to his death. “Now [we] have our family looking at each other like, ‘Well, what happened?'” Rose shared with Gayle King.
She faced public backlash following her memoir
It wasn’t just his family who defied Allison Holker’s memoir. Some of Boss’ fellow dancers and “So You Think You Can Dance” competitors took to social media to express their distrust in the narrative Holker presented. Courtney Platt, who competed with Boss on “So You Think You Can Dance,” made scathing accusations in an Instagram post, detailing that funeral attendees had to sign an NDA and that Holker dropped her husband’s last name on social media less than 48 hours after his passing. “Stick to your own demons,” she wrote in the post.
Other dancers, friends, and fans of Boss’ took to social media to share their distrust of Holker’s narrative. When she would post interview clips to her Instagram, people would flock to the comments to accuse her of erasing her late husband’s memory and instead focusing on the paycheck she got from telling his alleged “story.” “I was fully supportive about you moving in and being happy but this paycheck was not worth disgracing his name,” one follower wrote in the comments of one of Holker’s posts.
She became a mental health advocate following her family tragedy
While facing simultaneous grief and public backlash, Allison Holker turned to mental health practices to help keep her aligned and grounded. In addition to launching the Move with Kindness foundation in Boss’ honor, she has become an ambassador for organizations like CorePower Yoga, which spotlights mental health as a major aspect of healing. These actions weren’t just for her, though. She also focused on maintaining her mental health for her children’s sake, as well as helping them work through their own struggles in a healthy way through honesty and vulnerability.
Holker affirmed that it took a long time for her and her family to find their joy again after such a devastating and public tragedy, but through their journey, she hopes to help others in an effort to make people feel like stronger humans. “The reality is that we will all experience lows, but what counts is how we walk our way through it,” she said in an interview with CorePower Yoga.
If you or anyone you know is struggling or in crisis, or needs help with addiction issues, contact the relevant resources below:
