Ben Affleck may be an Oscar-winning actor, but when it comes to marriage, he’s been on a tragic losing streak. The “Gone Girl” actor tied the knot with two famous Jennifers — and divorced them both. And if there’s a common denominator in these failed marriages, well, it’s looking like Affleck might just be the issue.
While Affleck doesn’t exactly have a Hollywood-style reputation for serial dating compared to his peers in Hollywood, he’s been pretty open about his role in his relationships’ downfalls. In a chilling 1999 Playboy interview, he bluntly confessed that he’s often the one to blame when things go south. “If I were the next guy to go out with them, I’m sure I would be nodding in agreement about what an a**hole their ex-boyfriend was,” he admitted, even describing how he’d ghost his exes when he was ready to bail. “Then I create some incident or do something or just don’t call. And then she’s pissed. And I can’t necessarily blame her at that point since I’ve developed such a passive-aggressive rage that I have no sympathy and tell her, ‘Well of course I didn’t call you. If you weren’t such a nagging, shrewish harpy I’d call you.'” Funnily, Affleck hoped he’d outgrow this habit, but if his two failed marriages are any indication, that transformation might still be in progress — even up to this day.
Of course, his splits with Lopez and Jennifer Garner can’t just be boiled down to his passive-aggressive tendencies. His struggles with alcohol, personal demons, and a nanny scandal only added to the drama of it all. With a history this turbulent, it’s no wonder Affleck’s relationships have kept the tabloids busy through the years.
Ben Affleck said he was ‘trapped’ in his marriage to Jennifer Garner
Ben Affleck stirred up controversy when he admitted he felt “trapped” toward the end of his marriage to Jennifer Garner. In an unfiltered chat with Howard Stern, the “Batman” actor laid it all out, admitting that feeling boxed in led him to turn to make his liquor cabinet his BFF. “That was part of why I started drinking alcohol — I was trapped,” he said. “I was like, ‘I can’t leave because of my kids, but I am not happy. What do I do?’ What I did was drink a bottle of scotch on the couch, which turned out not to be the solution.” Unfortunately, his relationship with alcohol only spiraled out of control, and what he hoped would ease his burdens only made his marriage worse. “I drank relatively normally for a long time. What happened was that I started drinking more and more when my marriage was falling apart,” he told The New York Times. “This was 2015, 2016. My drinking, of course, created more marital problems.”
In his defense, Affleck later clarified that his words about feeling “trapped” were taken out of context, insisting he meant no disrespect toward Garner. Appearing on “Jimmy Kimmel Live!,” he expressed frustration with the media’s interpretation of his statements. While he was “happy” that he had an insightful interview, he said that his comments were blown way out of proportion. “I have to draw a line and be clear,” he said. “That’s not true. I don’t believe that. It’s the exact opposite of who I am … What I believe, and I would never want my kids to think that I would ever say a bad word about their mom.”
His struggles with alcohol were what ultimately caused their downfall
Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner gave it their all to keep their marriage intact for the kids, but ultimately, Affleck’s love affair with alcohol made it a losing game. In an interview with The Hollywood Reporter, he admitted that drowning his sorrows in a glass became his go-to fix during tough times, but it took a heavy toll on their relationship — leading to its ultimate demise. “We loved each other. We care about each other. We have respect for each other,” he explained. “I was trying to say, ‘Hey, look, I was drinking too much, and the less happy you become, whether it’s your job, your marriage, it’s just that as your life becomes more difficult, if you’re doing things to fill a hole that aren’t healthy, you’re going to start doing more of those things.'”
But through it all, Garner remained a rock for Affleck. She reportedly even staged an intervention and took it upon herself to drive him to rehab. In fact, long after their split, she was still his biggest supporter. “He knows that life was the downfall of his marriage. Jen set boundaries, she did everything to help him,” a source told ET. “She stuck by him and gave him ultimatums but he’d eventually fall off the wagon.”
Affleck, to his credit, is genuinely grateful for Garner’s unwavering support and made sure to tell the world. “I have completed treatment for alcohol addiction; something I’ve dealt with in the past and will continue to confront,” he penned on Facebook. “I’m lucky to have the love of my family and friends, including my co-parent, Jen, who has supported me and cared for our kids as I’ve done the work I set out to do.”
His affair with his kids’ nanny made the divorce even more complicated
As if Ben Affleck’s alcohol confessions weren’t complicated enough, his divorce from Jennifer Garner got even messier when rumors surfaced that he had a fling with their children’s nanny, Christine Ouzounian. Just a month after he and the “13 Going on 30” star announced their split, Us Weekly reported that Affleck had the hots for Ouzounian. “They would hang out without the kids,” an insider told the outlet at the time. “And they were very flirty.” The source even went on to claim that Affleck was the one making moves, even talking to Ouzounian constantly after the separation, saying, “She says Ben really, really likes her. She’s saying this is true love.”
Affleck, however, shot down the rumors, with his rep calling the nanny affair story “complete garbage and full of lies,” accordin to People. Garner herself even stepped in to set the record straight, telling Vanity Fair that by the time this supposed scandal hit the tabloids, their marriage was already long over. “Let me just tell you something. We had been separated for months before I ever heard about the nanny. She had nothing to do with our decision to divorce. She was not a part of the equation,” she said, although she didn’t pretend it was a complete non-issue, either. “Bad judgment? Yes. It’s not great for your kids for [a nanny] to disappear from their lives. I have had to have conversations about the meaning of ‘scandal.'”
J.Lo and Ben reportedly realized they were two different people
Everyone thought Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck were finally getting their fairytale ending when they rekindled their romance — but it turned out to be another heartbreak instead. What looked like a story of two people finally figuring things out after years apart ended with them realizing they still weren’t a match. According to an insider, it became obvious for the two of them that they weren’t built for the long haul.”It was more and more apparent they weren’t a good match,” they told Us Weekly. “It boiled down to [the fact that] they are two different people.” Their differences ran deep, too, right down to their lifestyles. “Jennifer loves luxury, mansions, jets, yachts, red carpets and all things glamorous. Ben has never liked those things,” the source said. “Unless he is promoting work, he doesn’t like the spotlight.”
But it wasn’t for lack of trying. Lopez admitted to Interview Magazine that she gave it her all, only to realize she’d missed the signs from the start. “There’s times when I thought I figured it out, and then life goes, ‘Let’s send you another thing and see if you fall for it,'” she explained. “When your whole house blows up, you’re standing there in the rubble going, ‘How do I not ever let that happen again?’ And then you start examining it little by little saying, ‘Okay, I did this, this was my part in it, this was what I should have seen early on, this is what I didn’t look at.’ Those things are what really are the lessons.”
Ben’s erratic moods were apparently a contributing factor, too
It’s not Jen — it’s Ben. Jennifer Lopez went all out trying to make her marriage with Ben Affleck work, but his infamous mood swings reportedly made it impossible. According to a source close to the couple, Affleck’s unpredictable moods took a toll on everyone around him, especially Lopez. “Who he said he was and who he turned out to be were two different people,” they told People. “He doesn’t understand how his bad mood affects people around him.”
Lopez, ever the fixer, tried to help him manage his emotions — maybe a little too much, at least according to her friends. “The way she cared for him was almost childlike. Friends constantly reminded her that she’s not responsible for his feelings,” another source shared with the outlet. “He’s very moody and dark at times. Jennifer appreciates life in another way. She’s very grateful for everything.”
The upside? They’re committed to staying friends and both seem to be moving on. Affleck is reportedly pouring himself into work — his happy place — while Lopez is focused on finding happiness within herself. “Being in a relationship doesn’t define me. I can’t be looking for happiness in other people,” she told Interview Magazine. “I have to have happiness within myself. I used to say I’m a happy person but was still looking for something for somebody else to fill, and it’s just like, ‘No, I’m actually good.'”
